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Unkie Ash

According to Section 420, Paragraph 14 of the Canadian Criminal Code:

"Those engaging in the oral consumption of canned octupus, or other tinned cephalopod, shall at all times be held responsible for the successful containment of said salty meats; containment considered either (i) the tin itself, or (ii) the individual's oral cavity. During transfer from tin to mouth, due care and diligence must be exercised in maintaining control of the sea meat. Should an individual engaged in the transfer and consumption of octo munchies fail at any point in successfully containing the disgusting contents of the tin, that person shall be immediately cock punched."

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