Daxohol

BORN!

She's here!!!

Clara Elana is here 6lbs. 8 oz.

and feeding as we speak! 

Ladies and Gentlemen, I'm a mess.

DAXON'S COUSIN IS ENTERING THE WORLD AS I TYPE!

You cannot beat this for real time blogging:

I am going to be an Auntie in RIGHT NOW! It is now 1:30 pm and I just got off the phone a few minutes ago with my sister's husband Daddy G-Man and he let me listen to her pushing!!!!

I  just finished pacing 20 laps between my computer des k and the washing machine crying, praying and trying to send my spirit as close to her as possible.

FREAKING OUT OVER HERE!!

Happy Legalversary!

December 14 2003, Gary and I got married.  Technically. Well, spiritually too, but only our parents and my grandmother were present.  It was a beautiful event and I was all preggers.

Ahhh.....I remember it well...*dillidit dillidit dillidit* - Aw yeah, Wayne and Garth Style Edit...

Exchanging rings...

Mmmmm cake!  I told Gary to eat me.

Notice the Yabbos.  *Sniff* How I miss you Yabbos...

"I promise to love you forever."

"I promise not to kill you."

I love you so much Gary.  The man you are since becoming a father is even more irresistable and amazing than the day I told you I loved you when you where...ummm...well...I just love you

...and when I say LOVE I mean LOVE.

Amazing Grace

Grace Davis.

Generous.  Brilliant.  Fabu.

A total babe.

Go to this site.  See what she's doing.  If the spirit moves you, see how you can help.

Daxohol Smooches Auntie Tita and Unckie Redneck

I know, it's been really sappy around here lately and I'm probably making a few people throw up or take a break.  But, I have to do this edition of Sloppy Smooches now because I think these folks should read this now.

Auntie Tita and Unckie Redneck.

Where do I begin.  Think of this couple as a wild western cowboy ho-down in the midst of a gorgeous summer sunrise.  The ho-down? Unckie Redneck.  The gorgeous sunrise?  Auntie Tita.

Auntie Tita wakes at the crack of dawn.  She goes to school, she's a mother to her beautiful daughter, and a loving, caring and very attentive wife to Unckie Redneck.  She knits.  She cross-stitches.  I swear there are times when she goes into "Matrix Mode".  She appears to be going in slow motion, but really, she is moving far too fast.

This woman doesn't hold back the love.  No.  It's not what you think.  She's not that kind of woman!  She tells you she loves you any chance she can get.  She could probably write these Sloppy Smooches posts for everyone every single day.  If you are sitting there eating a muffin, or just cleaning your floors, she will launch into a biggest proclaimation of love completely unprovoked.  And it's all genuine.  Seriously, this woman loves her friends THAT MUCH. 

That is one reason why I treasure her. 

Auntie Tita would get along great with the Complimenting Commenter.  She loves to make people smile and make people feel good no matter who you are. One of her hobbies is to compliment total strangers.  If a woman ever holds the door open for you, and then tells you that you look great in that suit, or that your eyes are pretty, chances are you've just been Tita-ed.  Her philosophy is that the world is a cold and negative place most of the time.  People need to hear good things coming from strangers.  They need to taste the raw happiness that a nice, sincere compliment from a stranger can generate.  It can make your day.  It can even change a life.

Let's shift the focus to Unckie Redneck.  He's a cowboy.  Seriously. He's tall, slim and he has a mustache.  He wears cowboy hat and boots. All he is missing is a horse and a gun.  But he's a Canadian cowboy so he uses a fishing pole instead of a gun.  It's just as effective! You should see the damage a hook can do if you whip it at someone 10,000 times in one second.  Yup, cross him and that is the kind of force you are reckoned with pawtna. 

He and Unckie Science Bear have grown up together.  Which means, though Unckie Redneck may terrify you to look at him, he has a heart made of pure solid gold. 

*Cartman's voice* Seriously.  I love you guys. 

Daxohol Sloppily Smooches Auntie Bernie and Unckie Science Bear

Okay.  This post is the first of a new category of posts I will include on Daxohol.  It is called, Sloppy Smooches From Daxohol.  I thought about adding this category because I am surrounded by so many wonderful souls that make my life the just *that* much more interesting and I feel that it's healthy in friendships to tell them how much they mean to you.  But, I am not so good at that kind of stuff in person.  I just end up sounding like one of those crazy guys downtown trying to ask you the time but ends up taking a 5 mile conversational journey through some rain forest in Alaska where he thought he saw an old friend named Ted.

Like I said, this is only the first, this is not going in any order.   

I am going to kick things off with Auntie Bernie and Unckie Science Bear.

Auntie Bernie.  A sexy redhead with a singing voice that makes your hair blow back.  She's got talent, brains and perhaps most important of all, she's got cats and Unckie Science Bear.  Unckie Science Bear.  Think of a skyscraper with a go-tee that could recite the periodic table and tell you how fast your blinking.  He is actually a Scientist.  Right Unckie Science Bear?! 

They spent almost the whole day with me in the hospital the day Daxon was born.  They threw a baby shower for us, and most of all, they host the biggest, baddest, most freaked out Labour Day Weekend Bash on the planet.  People die and get reborn and get married at this party. 
Seriously.

Daxon loves it when they come to babysit.  The first time they babysat, Daxon fell asleep on Unckie Science Bear while he was having his bedtime stories.  That deep low soothing voice...of course, you realize Unckie Science Bear deviates from the plot of Roosevelt Rhino's bedtime routine and fills the story with much more fascinating information about the mechanics of the train Roosevelt has.

On Tuesday, they came to be with Daxon while we went to a rehearsal for a show.  They arrived on their motorcycle.  The motorcycle of course, which Daxon later stole.  That night, after they found Daxon and the motorcycle in one piece, Auntie Bernie put Daxon in the bath.  Daxon rewarded her by saying "Auntie! Auntie! Auntie!"  This rewarded Unckie Science Bear with a track record for clearing all the stairs in one single bound (yes, he's THAT tall) to see what horrible scene awaited him after hearing Auntie shrieking BEAR! BEAR!

One time, pre-Daxoholism, I was locked out of my house.  It was cold and raining outside.  There where wolves after me. They where the only ones around to hear my pathetic plea for help.  They rescued me.  They took me in, made me a meatball sub, fed me delicious fresh baked chocolate chip cookies and let me crash on their couch.

Daxon is going to be spending some time at the cottage with Auntie Bernie and Unckie Science Bear this summer.  Hopefully, Unckie Science Bear won't have to clear the entire beach strip to learn Daxon said "Avogadro's Number".  Fortunately, baby monitors only work one way.

Auntie Bernie and I have a special chemistry.  We can speak simultaneously for paragraphs on end, but totally miss trying to high five.  We like to bash our heads against walls too.  She saw my boob in Lake Erie before Dave La Dave almost did.  Thank you sweetheart.  You know I am forever indebted to you.

Unckie Science Bear fixes our broken or badly behaving stuff.  His heart is actually bigger than he is.  Even if that sounds scientifically impossible, it's possible.  He's scientific proof.

Auntie Bernie assures me I'm not crazy.  She is way crazier than I am.  She is a strong soul, with a deep heart and a free spirit.  She sends waves of laughter everywhere she goes by asking randomly "HEY! WANNA SEE SOME PORN?!"

Bernie, Science Bear, you are gift to the Daxohol family.  We all love you both very much.